One year. So much has happened in one year. Nikki is now a college student, and Ryan has grown a foot and is immersed in preparing himself for college. Chris has started a new job and Oliver is now fully mobile and vocal. Rusty and Emily are married. Dad has settled in to life at Atria where he can spend as much time as he likes with people and puzzles and his every need is provided for. Lisa's father's health has taken a turn for the worse and he has moved to Atria as well. Grey and Sharon have moved in to home in which they were destined to live.
Mom would have loved being a part of all of it. Laughing at the stories, dispensing advice and making memories for us all. She would even appreciate the part about Dad because, deep down, she had to know that she would not have been able to provide for him by herself for much longer t han she did. And he is in a good place.
We've filled a year with life that Mom could not share. I've missed her. Her support. Her playfulness. Her silly stories. And I catch myself thinking, "What would Mom say about this?" almost every day about something.
I'm thyankful for having had Mom in my life for 62 years. And, strange as it mayy sound, I'm thankful for how her life ended. Mom was, above all else, full of life. The thought of her suffering from a lingering illness or disability - slowly killing that laughter and spirit - is unimaginable. Mom never had to surrender her strength, independence or love of life.
And I know it sounds cliche, but Mom's sudden passing was a huge reminder to me of how fragile life is. Moments before her accident Mom had plans. Dinner plans. A to-do list around the house. Thoughts about Russ and Emily's wedding. Last minute preparation for Kit and Ross' visit. And in an instant those plans became meaningless. This was my mother's final lesson - to me and all of us:
That we are so fortunate to live this life, and that every day we live us a gift to be cherished in the moment. We will always have plans and distractions. But I have resolved to awaken each morning feeling fortunate and full of hope for the day ahead. And to thank my mother for the day, and for her love, every night as I go to sleep.
You'll be with me always, Mom. Sleep well. 8/17/2018